Funkmaster V Reviews|
7800 Rank: Unranked
Remember the Old Joke "Why Did The Rabbit Cross The Road?" Me Neither
32 games in one cart!
32 kinda crappy games in one cart!
Baltimore Represent! F*ch Fish, We Want Dem Crabz, Bois.|
Overview: There were 57 official releases for the 7800... IF...you were an American. Little nerds in other parts of the world were treated to two additional games that we Yankees were not loved enough to enjoy. So... Do you still think America is #1, little boy? I didn't think so. One of the foreign titles is the much balleyhoo'd light gun game Sentinel. There's plenty of gloss about that one out in the world, but the other one seems to be even more mysterious... the elusive and flirtatious 32 in 1 cart: a sexy, mysterious, incredible multi cart filled with amazing 7800 games you have never heard of or dreamt of. Games such as Street Fighter 3D, Darth Vader Death March, Sleep with Freddy Mercury, I killed These Kids I was Paid to Watch 2, Porpoise on Purpose, and the RPG: Midnight Mutants 2: Jimmy's Denim Boog-aloo.
OK... maybe not THOSE games... and maybe not even 7800 games. FINE. But what you get are 32 fully fleshed out 2600 titles with some weird inclusions, odd exclusions, and curious graphical hacks for no reason whatsoever.
What We Gotz Here: This was a cart that was released in PAL format in Europe, Australia and New Zealand. Most were the pack in game with the Atari 2600 in the UK and Atari 7800 in Australia and New Zealand but it was also released as a boxed separate game for the Atari 2600. A different game was selected every time the Atari 2600 or Atari 7800 was turned on.
The games were:
1) UFO (a renaming of U. S. Game's Space Jockey)
2) Flag Capture
3) Human Cannonball
4) Reversi (a renaming of Atari's Othello)
5) Activision's Checkers
6) Slot Racers
8) Fishing (a graphic hack of Activision's Fishing Derby in which you are fishing for crabs)
9) Freeway Rabbit (a graphic hack of Activision's Freeway in which you are a rabbit)
10) Space War
11) Fun with Numbers
13) 3-D Tic-Tac-Toe
15) Miniature Golf
16) Activision's Boxing
18) Air-Sea Battle
19) Freeway Chicken (a renaming of Activision's Freeway)
20) Activision's Tennis
21) Activision's Skiing
22) Activision's Fishing Derby
23) Sky Diver
26) Activision's Stampede
27) Activision's Laser Blast
29) Slot Machine
31) Home Run
32) Ant Party (a renaming of CommaVid's Cosmic Swarm)
Obvious glaring omissions are Centipede, Asteroids, Missile Command, Space Invaders, Berserk, Defender, Pole Position and Warlords. On second thought they probably wanted you to still buy those. So... these are games that Atari didn't care if you bought or not... the junk. This cart might have been acceptable for 2600 owners in 1981 or 82... but for 7800 owners in 1986... this was insulting hot garbage. What I find odd are the inclusions of several decent Activision games, especially considering the cantankerous relationship between the two companies. This could have been an intentional dig, actually. Freeway Rabbit (the graphical hack of Freeway) and Freeway Chicken (the moniker hack of Freeway) being counted as two games is dubious and filled with guile. However, Fishing Derby being changed to include crabs intrigues me and stirs my Baltimorian blood... but if I'm really honest with myself... its just as cheap as the Freeway gimmick.
Okay... looking over the list... Freeway, Fishing Derby, Stampede, Tennis... all Activision games, seem to be the best of what we got here.
Would I recommend hunting this game out? Well... what if I told you that this is just the same ubiquitous 2600 32 in 1 cartridge with just an ugly 7800 label slapped on it? Does that turn you off, baby? Well... dammit.
Graphically enhanced Crabs aside, this game is a DUD.
Buy a 2600 version of this, slap a printed off 7800 label on it. Viola! You just saved yourself BANK. Seriously... there's not been one of these available on ebay for years... anyway... give yourself a break, game collector.
JUST A REMINDER FOR MY FELLOW YANKS:
If you happen to score this cart in the wild, remember the 7800 version is for PAL systems only... meaning the game is unplayable on a regular NTSC (American) Atari 7800. If you are dying to kill rabbits or fish for crabs, you can play the 2600 32 in 1 cart, if you can find one of those. Besides the label... they are indentical.
Additional Information: I would like to thank Moby Games for screenshots, information, and the game list used in this review.